My Poison Aria

Piece: Poison Aria by Charles Gounod from Romeo et Juliette
Time span of study: 2 years
Two years=Lotsa work done on this piece
And yet, I still feel like I was missing a very huge "something" about that piece.

As I pondered on this with Audrey,
it came to me...
The best arts I've ever seen in my life
are the ones that give a new spin--the artists' new spin to traditions.

There two things that are involved in the creation of good arts:
1. The art form
2. The artist
In opera's case, it'd be:
1. The music
2. The singer

What I lack (disclaimer: I'm a work in progress. I have a lot of lacks)...
BUT, what I lack is in number 2.
I've spent 2 years studying, observing and perfecting my technique--perfecting the number 1.
It's hard work, and it's so tempting to want to dwell in the hard work I've put in.
But dwelling in your hard work is listening to your ego speaking.
This previous year, I felt stuck in alot of my music--especially in this piece.
Then it dawned on me...
There's a tiny switch that can shine a whole new light to my singing.
And that light is me.
How do I feel about the music?
What does the passages makes me want to do?
How honest can I be?
How real can I be?
Do I believe in what I am singing?
That word "mais" in that chord...
what does it actually mean?
How does the dagger look like?
Where's Tybalt?
Who's Tybalt?
What colors would I use for those phrases?
What spin will I give for this piece that's been done hundreds of times by other singers?

Then, I had a light bulb moment.

Not one person is a carbon copy of another.
Every singer has his/her own voice.
And you always sing on your own voice.
Why?
Because you have your own voice.
You have your own soul.
You have your own personality.
You have your own brain.
You have your own body.

We've heard this many times, but it won't make sense till we have our light bulb moments.

We are not made to be robots and clones.
Sure, opera is an old art form.
It's been done SOOO many times by SOOO many singers in SOOO many years.
There are traditions that singers must know and follow.
But, the great artists never sing like anyone else but themselves.

Be true to yourself. You know who you are and you know how to be yourself.
Stop trying to tell others how to be themselves.
Stop trying to figure things out.
Just start being.